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Behind The Scenes


5/29
I keep mentioning how life is unfolding in my videos that focus on my struggle with anxiety and depression.  I thought I would share with those who were curious what that phrase actually meant.  Just prior to videoing the last installment (number 7)  of My Struggle with Anxiety and Depression: A Teachers Story I had a very difficult 72 hours.  My mother-in-law fell, who lives with us,  in the early morning hours. and had to be taken to the hospital by ambulance. A student who had become very much like family to me decided to keep a stash of weed in my classroom inside her purse.  On my way home I discovered my mother-in-law was diagnosed with cancer.  A friend of my son's tried to commit suicide in my house, she is better now.  And in the evening my mother had a stroke and is in the hospital on the same floor with my mother-in-law.  

 Needless to say I am worn out.  My wife is exhausted and school just keeps moving forward  at a relentless pace.  When I talked about the main thing that keeps me going, I was and am very much practicing what I preach.  I know good things when I experience them and I make a point to live in the glow of those things as much and and as fully as possible do that when dark days like these happen, and they will always happen, I can remember the great feelings of the days int he past.

 Keeping a physical list of achievements and events that have made me feel great helps a lot.  The Encouragement Wall I keep also helps.  I'm not going to lie.  It is hard to stay focused on the good things when so much is going on at the same time.

 6/24
Life keeps rolling fast.  After one Chemo treatment my mother-in-law chose to go into hospice care on Thursday 6/13.  she passed away Friday morning 6/14.  I immediately began teaching summer school and I continue to feel detached from all that is happening around me.  It's like I'm just floating through all of this.  Summer school ends 6/27.  I will actually have break.  I just hope it is not a "break".  that is where I am for the moment. 

 On the bright side my channel hit 340 subscribers.  I have over 40 scripts for future video projects.  Trying to be as productive as I can.

 Managed to post a new video this past weekend...

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8qvmXolaqbI

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